Uncertain Sweetness

Love  or  Hate ?

    What's up Bitches! Yeah, I know. It's been so long that I wasn't able to write and blah blah blah. Damn reasons! I've been missing myself lately, maybe that's the reason of this writing scheme. I don't know what to say because I'm feeling empty again.

Although, I have new set of friends but still there's something or someone that is bothering me. I'm not being emotional and I don't want to be. I am stress from school projects, event coverage and etc. I feel uncertain of what I am now. Maybe, I'm just so tired that I can't even give a damn minute or a day for myself. So, I think I need a break. I  need to be with myself and to stop fooling myself around with other people.

I am happy because I am a happy person but there's just this thing that for so long I kept this buried in mind. LOVE. Perhaps, it's the biggest factor that every person in this crazy world needs. Love is not just being in love but being out of love for others to be happy.

I still can't figure myself being in love and damn I admit I'm so curious. All I have now is the uncertainty that makes me feel dumb because someone is being sweet and I'm drawn to that person.

Moreover, I'm happy being with myself again. This is not a big problem but I think this is hard because it's just me - ALONE. Nobody cares and I hope my heart can say this, "The hell I care," but it won't let me.

The hardest part to control is what's inside my heart. I hope I can tell my mind to stop thinking and let die all the thoughts that will consume my heart into darkness.